Requested from Magisk here: http://forum.specialattack.net/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=1859

I wrote these when I was 14 or something, spamming the RP section of a forum of a friend of mine. They had a subforum called War of the Assassins or something (I think it's some Dune stuff, but I didn't know at the time), so I wrote a couple of chapters for everyone's enjoyment.

Chapter one "The Carpet"

"Holy father of the republic, a man, or beast in disguise, is waiting at the door. Shall we let him, or her, or it, inside, my lord?" The messenger looked up from her bow, to see a nod from the old man sitting on the golden throne. "Whatever dares inside and does not follow the well known strict rules of this castle, will by magic be forced into an eternity of pain. Bring the visitor here."
In came an old man, dressed in a cloak. Almost a minute passed without any of them saying a word. "What are you here for, old man?" the king finally asked. More time went. The king asked once more "Tell me why you have arrived to my castle." Finally, the old man answered. The king smiled. "I will join you." And so, the old man took off his cloak. He wore nothing underneath it. The king also removed all of his clothes, and they lay down on the carpet. It would be come dirtier than the king's daughter had ever seen it....

After a few hours, the two old men stood up and got dressed. "I am glad you chose to what you did, king. The alliance with us will bring prosperity to our kingdoms.....though not to the assasins.....farewell, take contact tomorrow, and we will make a plan to crush the asassins." With these words he went out of the castle, leaving only what was left on the carpet.....

Chapter Two, "The Beauty and the Beast"

"Holy Father of the Republic, we have news....". The King sat down on his throne. "Daring to enter this room, my realm, without even knocking, there must be serious things happening within my kingdom, urgently needing my attention. Tell me what you know, and leave me be." The servant raised from his bow, before he sat down on his knees and started to talk. "As you know, the strength of the assasins have been rising ever since your alliance with the King of Bunr was destroyed. Late yesterday, however, our spice informed us that they are planning an attack on all statesmen in our kingdom. They are not to be underestimated. That was all." The servant left, and the King was left with his worries.

Finally, the King made up his mind. "Bring in my dresser!" he shouted, and in came immidiatly a small man, dressed in the most modern clothes. The King sighed. "Daughter, come in and clean my carpet again!". He turned to the dresser. "You, old man, shall make me the most beautiful of men in this, and all other kingdoms." The small man looked up, then down, stopping on the half. "I shall try, my lord."

And so he did.

After four days of constant beautying, the King was ready to go. He sat up in his Royal wagon dragged by dragons, and asked his rider to start. Behind came his servant. While cleaning up his mess, he shouted to the King "Holy Father, you forgot your gold for the trip!". But the King was too far away to hear it.

After having travelled for a day, they reached the outer parts of his kingdom, and stopped at an Inn. Here, however, noone had heard of the king, and money was needed. At this moment, The King discovered what he had forgot. "Oh no! What a shame! What shall I do, now that I can't get food, nor water, not even sleep! out here in the wilderness?!" An old man raised from his chair. He was ugly as the Beast himself, with purple clothes and green skin. He seemed older than the world itself, and had probably been in more wars and in more pig houses than anyone else. Also, he smelled like rat poison mixed with dragon excrements, which the King knew was not a good smell. However, he saw the bag of gold the old man had at his side, and turned to him. "I might be able to help ye, o' beauty one." The King tried to look as friendly as possible. "How may I serve you, oh mighty rich man?" The old man smiled. "Ye see, I have a carpet on the buttom o' di bag." The King was filled with disgrace. He was in the middle of nowwhere with no food and water, surrounded with enemies, and he had certinly done worse things with old men. But this man....or beast....
"If I must, I must. I shall not die here, when salvation was near. Lead me to your room." The old man smiled even more. "THIS is our room...."

The old man pulled out his carpet from the bag, and layed it on the floor. They both undressed all of their clothes, and lied down. The Carpet was soft, but he could feel hewas not the first man to lie here. "For The Republic!" The King shouted, and their act started...

The old man drove him a hard time. One timewas not enough. Neither was two or three. Four was a number also too small. Not even five times would the old man let The King end it with. As they were done with the six'th time, it was neither the end. But at seven, the old man decleared, in a tired voice: "ENOUGH! Beauty, I have news for you. I might be ugly as the beast, but I have power as the King. By doing these acts of pleasure, you have started an at the moment temporarily alliance between your Kingdom and the Assasins. For I am The Lord Of The Assasins, Nasildar! Take this gold, and begone! for my lover must not see this."

The two men decided to meet again at the King's castle, and he promised to ask the King of Bunr to come as well. After that, the King left for his castle. Happier than ever.

I later tried to make an RP out of this with someone else, but he quit pretty soon if anyone wants to RP in this universe, let me know

I would like to play/write a TF2 forum-rpg that would be at least kinda funny and a fresh setting compared to all the other forum-rpgs nowadays.

Get some insipration, or continue, here: http://forum.specialattack.net/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=1873