Meet the Random Drop System
Announcer: Update Alert! Valve fixing Drop System!
Soldier: What? Valve's fixing the drop system?
Announcer: Get ready to update!
Soldier: We better get ready to update!
Scout: Yo, a little help here?
Soldier: Stand back son. Start Menu, All Programs, Steam, um... Steam!
Scout: Let's go! Let's go!
Heavy: FINALLY!
*They break down door*
Scout: Aww... it was a troll!
Spy: Gentlemen.
*Intro theme*
Spy: I see the drop system is not fixed. Tell me, did anyone happen to get a new weapon on the way here? No? Then we still have a problem.
*Shows them his backpack full of duplicates*
Scout: Ooo. A duplicate! Big problem eh? I get plenty of 'em. The useless, delete-right-after-you-get-'em phonies. Like you! Ow! No offense...
Spy: If you managed to delete them I assure you, they were not like me. And not like the random drop system forced upon this game!
Scout: What, are you a fan of the system?
Spy: No, that would be your mother!
*Throws pictures of Scout's mom cheering Valve employees as they code the system*
*Scout is surprised*
Spy: Indeed. And now Valve wants to ♥♥♥♥ with us! So listen up boy, or photographs showing your mother's treachery will be the second worse thing to happen to you today.
*Spy lights cigarette*
Spy: They have already stolen our milestones...
*Shows a conference room where Valve employees are crossing out milestone achievements*
Spy: They have ruined our achievement farming...
*Shows obscene chat on an achievement server*
Spy: Worst of all, we have to wait for the new content...
*Shows an achievement_idle server*
Spy: We could have to wait hours, days! We could even have to wait...
*Soldier shoots Spy*
Soldier: What? It was obvious. He implemented the new system! Watch... we'll get our new weapons any second now... Any second... See? New weapons! No wait... those are duplicates...
Heavy: So we still have baby system?
Soldier: I guess. Alright. Who's ready to go whine on the forums?
*Scout undisguises as Robin Walker*
Robin Walker: Right behind you!
*TF2 theme*
*Robin picks up pictures*
Robin: Ah, les faire souffrir.
