sebas' advice.

no. 1: always be drunk

my friend trying to hook me up: Listen to me..I'm telling you this dude, he's a great guy!
the girl: Well, I don't know...
me: HALLO GUSY WITH CAMPHERA!!




no. 2: When a girl touches you, go like this: EEWWWWW, COOTIES!


no. 3: Offer them gifts


no. 4: Get a cute lil' sister


no. 5: Do NOT have imaginary conversations with imaginary friends


no. 6: Be ALPHA MALE


Yes, I get bored easily.
Now let's see your advice. I know you have some.

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Comfortably Numb

what exactly is the thing on the right in no.5 supposed to be?

but yeah, I was expecting an embarrasing thread of the teenage emo type. I was nicely surprised

+1 sebas

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ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: true genius
ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: doesn't make sense
ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: till you're senseless

I guess its a romanian ALF.
Btw, ur sister is a marlboro robot?

My tips:

If you smoke, go outside of the bar(no smoking here in Norway) and find the ugliest chick you can find, because you're gonna drink yourself almost to death later on anyways. It doesn't matter plain and simple.

Start smalltalking but show no interest in the girl or what she's saying what so ever.

She will most likely follow you back into the bar and ask for you to buy her a beer. Say no.

Since the chick you've picked up most likely has some sort of anxiety for getting rejected and being alone.
How do I know this? Because you're most likely an ugly fuck, prettyboys don't need pick up tips.

Anyways, she will probably drink as hell because of that anxiety of hers and she will get shitfaced.
Since she's pretty fucking drunk by this point, she will most likely ask you if she can come home to you.
AND THIS IS IMPORTANT: tell her that you really want to, but you've just got out of a relationship and aren't interested in a one night stand.

Girls dig sensetive and chickensoup men. After you've been talking to her about releationships or whatever lie you can come up with..
Say something like: "you know..you're the only chick I've met that gets my mind away from my ex girlfriend". Guess how happy she will be.
Hint: very fucking happy.
Then you kiss her and take off your pants.

Mission accomplished you've gotten laid.

Now, a guide isn't complete with out this, because the next morning you want that ugly looking chick out of your home.
Like I said, you're an ugly fuck and there wasn't any chance of you getting laid with an average not ugly girl.

Here are some of which I use:

1. My parents are coming to visit me in about an hour
2. I'm meeting a friend in not too long

etc etc. It's not that hard. Just lie so you might have a shot at sleeping with her again.

Now this I've never tried, but I will someday. Start vacuum cleaning your house. Wake her the fuck up and start cleaning your bed, she will most likely just leave because you're such an annoying TINY LITTLE DINOSAUR ARMS.

Well, this concludes my 101 on how to get chicks and how to get rid of 'em the next morning.

-Suiclider

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but mastar cheef is a pretty cool guy eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid of anythign

so basically, the entire basis for your argument is that she's ugly or w/e

so why would you want to pick her up in the first place? :<

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ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: true genius
ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: doesn't make sense
ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: till you're senseless

sebas is a total playa

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a bird in a bird in a bird in a bird in a bird in a pig

this is soo good... i would totally do you m8 xD

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Sebas the avenging zebra's sidekick! <3

"Wanna go home and check out my komputar?"

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slurper

Jesus christ, you aren't supposed to take it seriously.

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but mastar cheef is a pretty cool guy eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid of anythign

you know, they call me the ALPHABET
because im ALPHAmale
and you can BET on it

works every time

He is actually, this one is missing photo from this tutorial:

Nono, never mention your exgirlfriend in the first conversation, that is a major turnoff. No matter if you are polight about her or bitching against her; either way makes you look bad. Saying that the girl looks like the girl in the movie you jerked off on would be an ever better compliment whahaha.

Something tells me I'm going to do well in Holland.

a guy with an accent will do fucking great anyway in holland.

btw. amyl, give more tips : P <3

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Sebas the avenging zebra's sidekick! <3

An even better compliment would be to tell her that you've seen her page on myspace and that you downloaded some of them for personal use.
Now you're ready for the real deal.

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but mastar cheef is a pretty cool guy eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid of anythign

hehe, I got that bit, I just sometimes pick apart peoples arguments for the sake of something to post :p

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ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: true genius
ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: doesn't make sense
ュ~ちゃんgamer.jp Pinky: till you're senseless

In that case:
Because you yourself are an ugly fuck as stated in my article.
I suggest you read a bit more carefully next time if you want to have a seriousface debate.

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but mastar cheef is a pretty cool guy eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid of anythign

read this

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